omgitsbee's Journals on Buzznet

Let me hold you, For the last time, It's the last chance to feel again, But you broke me, Now I can't feel anything

omgitsbee — 2009-03-17T09:56:00Z

When I love you, It's so untrue, I can't even convince myself, When I'm speaking, It's the voice of someone else, Oh it tears me up, I try to hold on, but it hurts too much, I try to forgive, but it's not enough to make it all okay, You can't play on broken strings, You can't feel anything that your heart don't want to feel, I can't tell you something that ain't real, Oh the truth hurts, And lies worse, How can I give anymore, When I love you a little less than before.

I dont.. I dont know what to say anymore. I dont know what to do. Its not.. betrayal. Its not, theres an excuse, they were drunk, all of them. But it hurts. And everything is completely and utterly fucked right now. Everything.
It doesnt hurt as much as i thought it would.. seeing as its happened before. But im just so confused about everything, its just scaring me how quick its all going. One minute, i feel happy. The next, it rushes back and im saddened by the fact that my entire trust has dissappeared. It makes me so.. insecure. I dont want it too, i cant blame him, neither can i blame her, because its niether of their faults. But it just.. ugh. I dont know what to think.
I hate the fact that, yet again, its happened to me. When i build up my entire trust after the last time 3 whole fucking years ago, just to have it knocked down again.. it really does scare me. Can i even trust ANYONE? Because im not sure anymore, i'm really not.
To Her:
I do not hate you, not one bit. I dont not feel any sort of those feelings towards you, i could never ever feel it to you. i dont feel the need to bitch about you, i dont feel the need to smack you, ignore you, or do anything else i used to do. Im disapointed.. but its to be expected, i counted you as a close friend to me. & Im angry, angry not for myself, but for what you've done to him. He's my brother, I would have thought that no amount of alcohol would have lead YOU to do such a thing. It still hurts me, stabs me right in the heart to think you betrayed him, as well as me. That boy is the closest to family i've actually got nowadays.

To Him:
I love you. I really do. I still do, and this hasnt effected the way i look... think of you. I have nothing to say to you, because i know it wasnt your fault. I wish, so much, that we werent going about this the way we actually are. i wish so much that we could just be normal again, before this happened. Your no traitor, i know you arent and i know you wouldn't usually do this. I understand you need 'time'.. i spose. I dont get it, your making it out to be as though i've done something wrong, and thats what hurts most. The fact that i feel like taking everything out on myself, like its my fault. I still feel its my fault; maybe.. if i hadnt gone out, and got drunk and annoyed you that night. Maybe if i had tried harder to keep peace between us, it might not have happened. Maybe.. UGH. But everything was fine when we spoke before. Im so confused. I dont get why its you who needs to think, i really think it should be me, and you trying hard to get me back, not the other way around.

I think, that im falling apart. I think im in pieces, and i dont know which direction to turn in anymore. : A week ago i was happy. Its shocking me.
'Beex

I'll close my eyes and hold you in my arms despite all the pain

omgitsbee — 2009-02-05T10:48:00Z

Your confession means nothing

I have found love in the architects. Jacob was right. Im so scared of you. You hurt me too much, your way to rough with me and i know one day i'll end up completely broken.

& you. You flirt, you decieve me, you make me believe something thats never going to happen. You disgust me. You've already left me completely broken.

'Beex

The bass, The rock, The mic, the treble,

omgitsbee — 2009-01-29T02:11:00Z

i like my coffee black just like my metal.

Kerrang Relentless Tour 2009, Newcastle; my first gig but definatly not my last.

The night started shit. The queue went for miles around the carling academy and my brother was saying he'd sell our tickets, because standing tickets were selling for over 40 quid. He also met all of his friends, going 'ugh, we're babysitting my sister and classical' his nickname for jazz ;). Fact: He wasnt babysitting us, he wanted to go, but my mum paid for his and gareths tickets. We pushed in the queue, really close to the entrance, My brother claiming to know the frizzy haired dude in front of us lmfao. When we walked down, he was going, 'drop dead soon, drop dead soon, drop dead soon, drop - die now.' to everyone LMFAO. It really wasnt his scene in all honesty. All the stupid sceney teenies were chanting at every bus that went past. It was really funny though, because you could tell they all came for bring me the horizon who had dropped out at the last minute. I was devastated, but cheered up when the girl infront tried to put a vodka bottle down the back of her skirt, it ending up dropping straight out onto the floor. Everyone was pissing themselves at the failure.

We got it really easily tbh, and my brother scammed them by jazz and I giving his friend our tickets and her going to the bathroom to give the tickets to them so they could get in. Bahaha. When in case of fire came on everyone was like, cool, no one had heard of them in all honesty. Black tide, wow they really are lush man, and they all had their tops off, lmfaoo. Nom. They're actually not that bad, but the bassist is a complete arrogant arsewhipe who wouldn't sign jazz's card. FAGGOT. And, Dir en grey.. Omfg. They really are fucking wierd. They werent bad, the vocals were really good, and the music was pretty good too, but omfg. The lead had a stiffy all night and i think he's fucked in the head or something. He was doing proper wierd actions and singing to his hand. What the fuck?

Then dir en grey went off, and MSI was set up. I've never seen anything like it, the kerrang relentless sign went and a Mindless selF Indulgence sign came, and as soon as that was there everyone knew bring me werent playing and that msi were about to come. And omg. me and jazz did have a good position, we were in the second row from the front. pretty much near the middle. We met some girls who wanted to chant, so we all decided we would, and we screamed MSI, MSI, MSI, till the whole academy was full of everyone screaming msi, lmao. It was amazingg, people were throwing water and diving on everyone. Everyone stunk and we were all sweaty as fuck :) Then, Jimmy Urine came on. i died. He's really hot. and jazz almost collapsed. i admit it. they're amazing. i cant believe how amazing they actually are. At the end, jimmy did a strip tease, and at the very end of the night his jeans came off. He also tried to get everyone singing to new kids on the block and no one did, lmfao, so he goes 'I DONT NEED YOU ANYWAYS.' and then carried on singing. Bahaha.

We never got to meet him, unluckily, but ahh wells. at the end we were given free shirts, hats, posters, badges, stickers, NOM.

I'd rather fuck you than kiss you but i wont press the issues.

I love Msi now. :)

'beex

The one thing that always tore us apart is the one thing I won't touch again,

omgitsbee — 2009-01-20T07:38:00Z

In a sick way I want to thank you for holding my head up late at night, While I was busy waging wars on myself, you were trying to stop the fight, You never doubted my warped opinions on things like suicidal hate, You made me compliment myself when it was way too hard to take, So I'll drive so f*cking far away that I'll never cross your mind, And do whatever it takes in your heart to leave me behind

Ugh. I dont know, whether to feel happy or sad. After 3 years of shit, and well.. happiness? i guess he brought me that. And, now he's leaving. Today was his last day, and his 'so called best friend' found out today, too. So much is going through my head. How, what, where, when, WHY. What disgusts me is that, i told everyone i hated him. I posted journal after journal bitching about him. Yes, he caused me shit. But when you look back on it, he made me smile more than anyone ever could. He was there for me when i had no one. He held my hand, when things were rough. He'd come to school, after a night of me, ranting and crying over the phone, and run up to me, grab me and hug me. He was always the one i could turn to. With everything. I rang him when all the shit with him happened. I turned to him when lauren left. He was the last reminder i had, apart from pictures, and a scrapbook, of lauren. Me and him often speak openly about our memories, and how we miss her. We still do. Honestly. I held onto him with both my hands because he was.. ugh. It hurts to say this but he was my everything. I let him get between me and lauren, i let him under my clothes, i let him into my heart, and i shared everything with him. Yeah, he treated me shit, and he made me do things i never dreamed i would, he lead me to believe i meant something then crashed me back down at a bad point in my life. And now, he's leaving. How, how the FUCK could he keep that from me? HOW FUCKING DARE HE. I know, i promised dayle we would not speak again, i know i avoided him, but i just.. i never dreamed that this would happen. He did tell me last term that there was a possibility he was going, but, i didn't believe him.. just like i didn't believe lauren. Shit. 2. thats now, 2 of the people that meant the most in my life, have gone. THE 2 people. I thought he might have told me, last week, or something, to fucking prepare me. At least lauren gave me fucking, 4 months. How could he do this to me, he said he cared. Now he's fucking crashed this on me, and he wouldn't even hug me goodbye. What brought this on, Where are you going exactly, when did you find this out, how could you not tell me first, your best? friend, and why. I need to know these to put my mind at rest.

I cant believe this is happening to me. Never, ever, ever did i think it would. I never thought i'd loose him. I thought he'd always be here. And, how could i fucking treat him the way i have the past few weeks? 'the last memory's will always be the best, beth.' Fuck that. I've ignored you, I've said things that i knew would hurt you, I've shouted shit i knew i didn't mean, and i think you knew it to, but most of all; i've fought with you. And i can never forgive myself for that. I saw you, in tears when we had that fight, and i laughed. I laughed in your face. And you're face, when i did, will always haunt me. You've hurt me physically, way too much, and emotionally too, but i stooped to your level, and i could see in your eyes that you were shocked. Shocked that I, the one person who sat by, who cared so much about you, that never stood up to you and took your shit, you were shocked that I of all people, the person who comforted you, knew what to say and when to say it, admired you, stood up to you. I'm shocked to. And i wish i hadn't, I thought i was being strong, but..

gah.

You've changed so much in the 3 years i've known you, I cant recognise the boy i fell in love with. I cant see who you actually are. But that moment, i saw my sam in your eyes.

My lyrics for today are so true it hurts. Its about an alcoholic, but, for me its about something completely different. He saved me, from everything i thought i could save myself from, everything that is possible to save someone from.

I just know one things for sure. I Miss You. Already. And its been one hour. &, You meant everything to me. I can never hide that fact. My Sam will never leave. And he has never left.I love you. Best Friends Forever; We made the pact, Lauren, You and I. And that will never, ever disappear. Ever. That pact was forever. forever. I will NEVER. EVER. forget you.

&I forgive everything you've done. Clean slate; I wish you endying happiness and i hope this new start will be an amazing new start for you.

'Beex

With dead tongues and lonely hearts we cough the poison out

omgitsbee — 2009-01-19T10:55:00Z

You thought you had me fooled, but you wouldn't last a day in my shoes.

So, I guess i learnt quite alot in the past few days. I learnt that, my brother is coming to the kerrang relentless gig that im going to. He was being a prick about it, but after a while, and a few arguments, we've worked it out and now, its all good tbh. He added me on myspace and said he cant be arsed fighting anymore, he wants to be friends with me. You dont know how i jumped for joy then, i was like, OMFG, FINAFUCKINGLLY! Its amazing dude, i've been waiting for this day forever.

I learnt about my love of the devil wear's prada lyrics; Chris has 'Christ still stands perfectly in my heart' tattooed across his chest. I think thats beautiful, and i really respect him for it, because he's not ashamed about his religion. Yeah, they're the devil wears prada lyrics too. I've decided that, the best lyrics tend to be from screamo songs; Bring me the Horizon, Architects, the Devil Wears Prada, if you read their lyrics and think deeply into them, wow.

I learnt that, when things actually come my way, i always push them away, even if its what i want. They split, and i guess im happy about it, but im sticking up for her because in my eyes they're both unhappy with this decision. For fuck sakes. She doesnt deserve him, this is utter crap, why/what am i doing. I always end up doing this. And it always ends up hurting me. Stupid, Stupid Beth.

Blood is thicker than water and you my dear. are an ocean full of spite.

You can try your hardest to turn me against him but babe, it's never going to happen. At the end of the day, blood really is thicker than water, and he means more to me than you ever could. Brother/BestFriend/My hero, for fucking ever. Get that in your head before you speak your shit.

'Beex

I fly like paper, get high like planes

omgitsbee — 2009-01-11T08:49:00Z

If you catch me at the border I got visas in my name, If you come around here, I make 'em all day, I get one down in a second if you wait

For my art project, we have to write about ourselves, creative writing and all. Its so hard. But i've decided to do a buzznet journal on myself for the first time, because then maybe it will be easier to write what i need to; obviously some parts of this will be left out on my art project, because its schoolwork innit. Its all based on what makes us, us, 'past, present and your future dreams'

So here it goes.

Past: 10.02.1994, Born & Bred in Sunderland, Moved to seaham when i was 5 and lived their for 5 years, Acting was a passion to me and i didn't have a care in the world, i could get up on stage and act without getting nervous or scared incase i messed up, but these days that seems to be the case. My life consisted of Horse Riding with my cousin every saturday, singing & dancing lessons on sunday, watching my brother learn tycondo every tuesday night, my best friends at school were Cassie & Ryan, and we'd pretend that the footprints in the small section of concrete on the school field was the devils prints and if we put our feet in them we'd become the devil.. cassie loved putting her feet in them and being 'possessed' by the devil, My next door neighbour Annie became the longest best friend i ever had, 5 years together and the only reason we drifted was because i moved to spain; infact i still speak to her sometimes. We thought we were cool, swearing in the middle of the street at the age of 10, and laughing at the concept of 'sex', boys still had cooties at this point, btw. When i was 3/4, i nearly died from drinking paint out of my old noddy cup, as it was orange and looked like orange juice, and my dad was painting the kitchen. I had to get my stomach pumped and dad shoved his fingers down my throat to make me throw up. Without that move i'd be dead from posioning. I was always scared of the dark, and fireworks scared the shit out of me.

Present: My days consist of loud music, tea & vodka, and i always appreciate cold weather now. I love having colds and just, sitting wrapped up next to the fire, with a hot chocolate, watching a film. I've lived in spain for 4 years, 5 years on August the 18th, and until may last year i believed gibraltar was a rock, not a hometown which i'd fall in love with. Seaham still has my entire heart, and i live in a world full with tattooed images & screaming speakers, but i never forget to smile. I fail to grasp simple concepts, and get facinated by the smaller things in life. I love you, those words mean nothing to me anymore as i've been lied to so many times. My best friend Lauren should have become part of my past so long ago, but we've stuck together, and we're still unseperable, when we're in the same country that is. I miss her, but its making us stronger living so far apart. 2 years is hard to break. My other best friend Conor is my very own jeremy kyle, only, he has better hair. Jammin gives the best hugs and, she knows what to say and when to say it. 2008 made me realise that life isnt all butterflies and cupcakes. I dont stand for ignorance nor bullshit anymore, and i never think before i speak. I still havent broken a bne in my body, and Bring me the Horizon has a huge place in my heart. Oli sykes and Lady Gaga are both god, and i loved them both before they were famous. Dayle & Spam are my heroes, and im scared of being forgotten. The dark doesnt effect me, as much, anymore. And even though i love winter, Summertime will always be my favourite time of year, i just hate how the sun makes my hair fade, and the cruise will always be my favourite holiday. 'Ahhhh gaaa do do do, push my apple shake the treeee' ;) oyesss.

Future Dreams: I aim to study art, fashion, photography & Journalism at Newcastle College. I want to share a flat with chris, so he can take me out and look after me when im drunk, like he promises he will. If i could live anywhere, it'd be a little cottage in seaham, on the harbour. I'd have a beautiful garden full of daisies, that i could take pride in, and in the summertime i'd sit on the swing that would be hanging from my giant tree. I could lie in one of the fields near the harbour, passed asda, and be completely free from my troubles and watch the cotton candy clouds pass through the big blue sky. I'd wake to the sun shining through my windows, without a care in the world. I want a nice, simple, uncomplicated boy who'll hold my hand, give me cuddles and hold me in his arms, and pick me flowers in the summertime. I love you will never be said until it is actually meant, and he wont be different around his mates. I want to create my own version of Kerrang magazine, and meet Oli Sykes. I want two children, and to live a long, healthy and happy life, as cheesy as that sounds.

'Beex

so now you'll know exactly what it feels like

omgitsbee — 2009-01-08T10:13:00Z

to be an obstacle in my way, you won't remain, you won't remain, save your breath don't even speak, if you'll speak of change, cause you wont, you won't, cut to the chase, spare the lecture on what it takes to make a man, cause you're weak and i'm strong, i will never falter, i'll stand my ground, you're a fake, a worthless coward, you're life wont mean anything, lets set things straight, what's done is done, i never needed you, tell me exactly who you think that you're kidding?, everyone will be happy when they find that you're missing, you asked if we'd ever forget you, we've got our fingers crossed, our fingers crossed, that's the danger in starting a fire
you'll never know how many bridges you'll burn
I hate you.I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you.

I fucking hate you.

clear enough?

'Beex

It's been the longest winter without you

omgitsbee — 2009-01-05T06:42:00Z

I didn't know where to turn to, See somehow I can't forget you, After all that we've been through, Going coming thought I heard a knock, Who's there no one, Thinking that I deserve it, Now I realize that I really didn't know,If you didn't notice you mean everything, Quickly I'm learning to love again, All I know is I'mma be ok, Thought I couldn't live without you, It's gonna hurt when it heals too, It'll all get better in time, Even though I really love you, I'm gonna smile cause I deserve to, It'll all get better in time, I couldn't turn on the TV, Without something there to remind me, Was it all that easy, To just put aside your feelings, If I'm dreaming don't wanna laugh, Hurt my feelings but that's the path, I'll believe in, And I know time will heal it,If you didn't notice boy you mean everything, Quickly I'm learning to love again, All I know is I'mma be ok, Since there's no more you and me, It's time I let you go, So I can be free, And live my life how it should be, No matter how hard it is I'll be fine without you, Yes I will, Thought I couldn't live without you, It's gonna hurt when it heals too, It'll all get better in time, Even though I really love you, I'm gonna smile cause I deserve to, It'll all get better in time.
I find it hilarious how much i pester other people not to under estimate me, when i do it myself. I've managed not to break my silence with him, i've managed not to fall back to him when times are rough, i've learned that he's not my 'everything' and even though i did speak to him the other day, and i said everything was cool between us, i still really despise him. I'm so proud of myself, and i know so is spam, and jazz, bambi and dayle and any of the other people who told me that what i was letting him do was inhumane on my part and that i should stop him abusing me, and i figured the only way to get that was to talk to him, and if all else fails, completely ignore him. The boy had the biggest hold on me that anyones ever had, he could charm me at anytime and i'd fall straight back at his feet, but he treated me like actual shit. I never believed in myself, i never thought i was strong enough to break that bond. For 3 whole years, he's been the one person my entire life revolved around, i became cautious because, he has the worst temper in the world, and the slightest thing can anger him, meaning silence. I couldn't stand the silence, when i'd find something to talk to him about, he would act like it meant nothing, when i couldn't find anything to catch his attention, i'd spread a rumor, or do something to piss him off, which would make him have to unblock me on msn, talk to me, even if it was to have a go. I cant believe how pathetic i've been for the past 3 years, he's not/ never was a best friend, he honestly meant everything to me and now means nothing, I almost lost my best friends because of him, and to be quite honest, all he's caused my life is pain and shit.

Who needs someone like him? Not me. And im just glad to be rid, if im completely honest.

'Beex

I would've given you anything

omgitsbee — 2009-01-04T04:32:00Z

Just to make you happy, Just to hear you say, that you love me one last time, I'd go to hell and back over and over again, Just to prove to you how much I need you here, There is nothing that I wouldn't do, I'd cry for you, I'd lie for you, And there's no doubt that, I would die for you, yes I will

Nom. Its actually pretty shit, i cant believe how quick i've fallen for him and i promised myself i wouldn't fall for another guy for a while. Im scared to talk to him, in all honesty, and hes completely out of my league. What to do, what to do!

Not after what happened with the others. How could he man, how could he? I got drunk, plucked up the courage to tell him i liked him; and he told her. I thought he'd forget about it, pretend it never happened, not mention it to anyone; its called trust. Yet he told her. And now, im fucking humiliated, i feel sick. It actually hit me so hard, i never liked him MAJORLY, but i did havea thing for him that i thought he could keep to himself. I've lost all respect, and trust with him. Never a fucking gain.

It hurts, so much. I guess it proves that, even your closest of friends cant be trust. i trust no one.

'Beex

Abduction is the way I start my day.

omgitsbee — 2009-01-02T16:03:00Z

Finally all my planning has paid off. Eager to dismember. Your skin so sweet and tender. Strapped to the chair. Degrading you right to your face. Gagged. Puking all over the place. It's time to finally shut you up. Stabbing you viciously. Watching your face was priceless.
Blood Splattered Satisfaction.

WOWOWOWOWOWOWOW. Oh my god. Tonight.. wow. Its all i can say. Well, tbh, i guess i have to start this journal with, Happy Eighteenth Birthday Joshua Charles Richardson. Your birthday was the highlight of my week. We had a meal, with about eighteen? people, and guess who i ended up sitting next to; Chris, and Ben. Omg. Ben, was wasted, and chris was just plain wierd.. at the start ;) 'Come sit here, beth ;)..' Help me. well, i thought that, at the start. Near the end, me and jazz had covered pretty much every subject, from guys, sex, drugs, alcohol, ex's, tattoos, piercings, hair, ben, lmaoo! msn, myspace, shoes, clothes, crushes.. man, i had so much fun. He's amazing him, and my brother kept taking the piss and making love hearts with his hand, and chris kept going, 'FUCK YOU I DO LOVE YOUR SISTER' lmao! It was amazingg. Jazz was busy exchanging glances and flirty looks, and holding eye contact with her mr lover lover ;). I flirted all night with mine, who's name will not be mentioned in case anyone whos knows him reads this, and it was amazing because he was kinda flirting back.

It felt so good that chris spoke to me, because usually my brothers friends sit there and act as if i dont exist. IM HERE FFS! gah. So many funny things happened though, with ben dropping his fork, then his knife, then both his fork and knife, the confusion at the start of the night about whos is whos, and chris going on about how me and jazz are posh fucks, ppffffttt, the waiter, who in chris's mind is a stud, and we should watch how he handles that bottle opener, lmao!,

Chris: dude, wtf is that on your plate

Ben: i dont know, i think it came out of my nose or something because it wasnt there at the start,

Chris: LMAO LMAO LMAO LMAO LMAO!

Beth: where'd it go :S?

Chris: dude, you didn't eat it did you.

Ben: um, yeah...

Gareth and Chris singing note to self, and screaming/growling in the middle of the restaurant, Ben and his 'OOH BABY.. OOH BABY BABYg sambuka shots including me and jazz, chris looked constipated after his 3rd whilst ben was doing them happily an!' And the 2 bottles of sambuka mam ordered, everyone doind laughing his face off, like they were water, they burn. And then, dom buying us drinks in the bar, and then 'accidentally' telling the woman who gives a shit when she barred him, chris giving us larger in the bar and josh giving jazz his cider, harry potter tattoos and ministry of defence written on doms back in the mirror, girl earings from claires accessories in chris´s ear, fucking puff, goffffffff!!!!!!! Lmao!

I lav lav lav that night, and my diary is completely fucking full of his name nom nom. Jazz´s, is so obviously filled with her lover ;) dude i wish wish wish that they werent like, 20/18. I looooooooooooooooooooooooooooove nights outt!

'Beex